Years after we became strangers
I am riddled with thoughts
Of a melded past
Of the reams of memories
Of those lost moments
Just out of grasp
Why must life be irreversible?
Why must we always move forward?
And why then can’t we ever forget?
It’s like going back in time
To the places you’ve been before
But this time they are bereft of people
Empty of action
Silent in words
And there I see the ghosts of our past
Walking down the cobbled alleys
I see them smiling, fighting, eating, drinking
It’s a yellow town
And a white lie
It’s a rocky coast
And a sea with salt from my eyes
It was the shortest of lives
And the deepest of all
To this place I will return
Without choice or effort
It’s here that I saw beyond myself
And fell into the abyss that you seem now
I might have clambered up the slippery walls
Into what the world believes is real. Practical.
My soul wanders the yellow town
Alone in the past.
I have your number and a phone without numbers to dial
I have your picture and an empty album
I have your voice and ears without their facility
I have your clothes and a body that fails to hold them
I have your breath and some skin that lies dead
I have your flowers and some stalks with prickly thorns
I have some tears and eyeballs that have dried up
I have more of my love and no more of your demands
I have myself and the knowing that you aren’t mine anymore
I look down at the milling crowd
I see you, that tiny black dot
Standing six feet above ground
Yet, several feet below me.
As you will always be.